My heart wants to write about this today.
I’ve been on the receiving end of a lot of love, a lot of help, and even encouragement. To be in this position, to be the receiver of all of this, has been very healing for me. I had past stories in my mind for years that I allowed to still follow me. Back in Jasmine’s early days of adulthood, the help I was used to from others, in my mind usually came with strings. It came with rules, expectation, and control.
And this time around, I had a very different experience.
The Unconditional Help
There was a crew of people that I was surrounded by, I don’t know how it turned out that way, I actually do know, but lucky me. A crew of people that knew some of the in’s and out’s of what I was experiencing, because of their own Christ journey. They know that becoming the love of God is no easy feat, and it requires 100% commitment. A crew that knew that it takes a very strong determination to do what I’m doing. A crew that sees the willingness to be homeless as as a part of the plan as strength, not weakness or misfortune. Most of these people I met later in life, but one or two were family.
I have to mention this lovely guy.
This officer went well out of his way, to let us stay in the house for 5 days after our lockout. Then, after us moving, he went well out of his way to make many phone calls on our behalf, to get us some information about shelter resources. He even took his work phone home with him each night, and continued to communicate with me several days after leaving the house. Forreal? I landed an angel.
My Family and Friends
I’ve pulled aunt Helen into this journey whether she liked it or not maybe almost a year ago, because I knew sooner or later, she’d catch on, and she has. She’s been one of my biggest cheerleaders, comedians and filling in any gaps with proactively taking the steering wheel and inserting assistance where she thought I could use it. No judgement towards me, just support on the phone. Me so lucky.
You’ve got my other buddy who hooked me up with my membership to the YMCA, for showers and workouts. A dear friend of mine since I moved to California 6 years ago. Deuces to you my friend.
Then there is my friend Sabryna and my sister Angela. I sometimes plug away at life, and I forget to stop and really ask for assistance. With these two, I never had to even ask over the last few weeks. It wasn’t a “let me know if you need anything,” or a “poor you, you must be so stressed out”.
It was more like a…
I support you, and I’m sending you money for gas, here is my house for a few days, I’m babysitting for free, we are coming to help you move.
They were just there, no questions asked, both of them.
My Ministerial Teacher and Group
This dear woman, I hope she doesn’t mind me calling her CJ here, has been there. She said to me the other week,
I knew from meeting you that the two of us have work to do together. I’m honored to be your mentor, and I am dedicated to you.
Her willingness to support my family has been, completely gracious. Max and Xander had the opportunity to go to one of the members son’s birthday parties. I had to be at the Agape International that day in Beverly Hills, so CJ was willing to be their chaperone for the party.
A few weeks ago over lunch, CJ gazes at me
If you are okay with this, I would like to throw a little birthday party for the boys.
So last weekend after class, the group surprises Max and Xander with a little birthday party. Cake, presents, and playtime. The twins were beside themselves.
Dude where do these people even come from?
Oh that’s right,
Instead of feeling sorry, or bad for me. They noticed, the peace, the laughs, and the obvious strength that I was exuding from my “situation” which is not really a situation, it just is and the isness of it is a part of my God in a body process.
Unconditionally Giving Because It’s all God.
There is a different kind of help, that is not the same kind of help as the first one. I remember this funny scene from Nursing School. One of my professors was clear to mention,
Please don’t become that Nurse that is inching her back towards the exit door of the patients room and she says, “Well, let me know if you need anything.” Rather than her saying “Tell me what I can do to help?”
There is a huge difference between the two statements.
Or what about this kind of help?
Oh I feel bad that you are in this situation, so i need to help you.
Back in the day, I would’ve been the first one to give a homeless person money, because i felt “sorry” for them.
When this happens, we are giving from a place of guilt, a place of seeing the other person as suffering, and not whole. We are clearly not seeing them as God or anywhere near God, if we feel sorry for them. If we don’t see another through this God lens, then we can’t know ourselves as God either.
Once you open your eyes, you look around and you see life. When you see life and replace the word life with God. You move through the scenes of God without your own value judgements, of what is fortunate and misfortunate. It is all neutral, neither good nor bad. You see God, experiencing God through different scenes, different forms, and different experiences. All temporary, all impermanent, and ever-changing.
You see God as God experiencing homelessness.
You see God as God experiencing losing a job.
You see God as God experiencing God as even losing a child.
It is all God.
All of it.
And when the pain is there, when it just feels so unloving to call these events in life….God, thats okay too. Sometimes the truth of God can be seen as very unloving to person who is suffering. And thats understandable on every level. It could mean that the truth should be laid aside for awhile….
But back to what I was saying, us as people can choose to see a world apart from God as long as we choose to.
You can still choose to see an incomplete world.
You can choose to still see someone’s circumstances as unfortunate and feel sorry for them.
You can choose to not see the truth.
You can always choose to not see God in yourself and another.
It’s irrelevant to whether that person that you are looking at, knows their true God nature or not, or the truth in what they are experiencing. But it’s you, seeing them clearly for who they really are as they experience being homeless, being diagnosed with cancer, or losing all of their life savings.
The information that they are nothing less than the love of God is for us to know, and for us to keep. That knowledge is given to us for us to treat them from a place of unlimitedness, non judgement, expansion, and light.
Without the value judgements, and stepping into naked awareness towards another, the projections we place on what another is experiencing; what replaces this is a deepened respect. A respect in knowing that God in another is experiencing what it desires to experience whether consciously or unconsciously.
As you are giving to another from this space of no obligation, and no conditions and seeing another for who they really are…
You are directly and immediately giving to yourself.
The friends and family I have mentioned have completely mastered unconditional giving. The art of giving and receiving being one. It’s a secret that most people think is one of those sing-alongs that have no meaning. Even the bible has some truth that you can’t misinterpret.
Do unto others as you would yourself.
Love you neighbor as yourself.
Or this beautiful piece from ACIM.
When you meet anyone remember it is a holy encounter
As you see him you will see yourself.
As you treat him you will treat yourself.
As you think of him you will think of yourself.
Never forget this, for in him you will find yourself, or lose yourself. A Course in Miracles, T-8.III.P-9:1
Literally in this experience, They saw themselves as me, and me as themselves.
Envision a world on the foundation of each individual projecting self empowerment onto the world? Imagine seeing everyone as whole, and seeing the human experience as an endless river, that has different currents, speeds, currents and curriculums? Yet…
It’s just one ever flowing river.
All integrated, overlapping and continuous.
It always comes back to this.
There is only one of us here.